Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Well...What Did You Expect??

...and...did it turn out otherwise?
Did you expect the promotion? Expect your appointment to start on time? Did some person, event, or situation not turn out the way you expected it to? Did YOU do something that didn't meet your own expectation?  The topic of "expectations" is so rich, so loaded and SO deeply embedded in our lives, that when we really take a look at it, it's quite easy to get sucked down the proverbial rabbit hole!
That being said, lets simplify.
We have expectations in just about every area of our lives. We expect our alarm clocks to wake us up. We expect the water to come on when we start the shower. We expect our drive in to work to include a specific route, and take a specific amount of time. We expect the key to work, that gets us into our office space. We have a constant stream of expectations going on all throughout the day. We rely on these expectations to be met, and have a tendency to 'lose it', or feel derailed, if or when it doesn't happen. Don't agree? Try having just ONE of those above listed expectations not met.
This phenomenon includes everything from expecting to see when we first open our eyes in the morning, to having the car to start when you turn the key in the ignition, to expecting the promotion, relationship or vacation to go 'as planned'.
Look into your life, and spend a moment in the times when you were thrown into a tailspin. Chances are, that tailspin was a result of some expectation not met. Some thing or some one did not respond or turn out as you had expected. The marriage. The job. The purchase of a car. The move to a different city. The list of possibilities is utterly endless.
Enter the phrase, "Keep your expectations low, and you won't be disappointed", or how about the idea that 'low expectations = less disappointment'?  I've even heard, "expect nothing...you'll be happy with whatever you get". Really? Is THAT the solution?  Things don't turn out how we expected them to, so we lower our expectations, even down to nothing?? Phooey!!
I say keep your expectations SKY HIGH!! Expect magic. Expect miracles. Expect results FAR beyond that which you even think is possible!!  Here's the secret, tho. Along with expecting the person, situation or experience to turn out TOTALLY in your favor and beyond your wildest dreams, is learning the skills to deal with it, just in case the result is something other than what you envisioned. Learn how to handle a result that looks different than what you saw coming.
This is the key that's missing in the world today. We 1) expect to get the shaft, so we're down and droopy all the time - or perhaps paranoid that the Universe is conspiring against us, or 2) we keep expectations high, but have absolutely no coping skills to get us over the hump when things don't 'go our way'. We as a society throw tantrums left and right. Road rage. Assault. Situational depression. 'Going postal'. Social media 'mud slinging'. Bullying. Feeling defeated. We, as a whole, have lost the ability to deal with things not going 'our way'.
Example: We go into the 20 items or less line at the grocery store. (go ahead, laugh...but you know its a 'thing'!!)  Ever count the items in someone elses cart, and consider saying something to them if they have 28 items...or maybe even if they have 21 items? We expect people to have 20 items or less, I mean they DID choose that line, right? So, they're aware of the stated parameters! But we may get a little ruffled if someone is in the 'wrong' place.
Or, how about studying night and day for the upcoming exam, and finding out that you got a C, instead of the A you worked SO HARD to get? Flight delays. Late dinner guests. Gas prices and kids coming in past curfew. Then, we get all upset and sideways because of these 'disappointments'.
ENOUGH, I SAY!!!
Yes, have high expectations. High hopes and dreams make life more colorful and engaging! But, learn how to handle it, when something turns out in a way that appears to be blah!
In any and every situation, there is ALWAYS a good, strong, balanced and healthy way of seeing things. Maybe you didn't get the job because there's something better on the horizon! Maybe the detour on your way to work will bring you by a new coffee shop in town, which you never would have seen, had you just stayed on your 'normal' route.  Maybe the person ahead of you in the express lane is too worried about a family member to even realize that they're in an express lane, and the one thing you can do to help make their day better, is to just let them go about their way. Flight delay? Gives you more time to practice your patience and 'disappointment handling' skills :-)
The world is much brighter, people are more friendly, opportunities are more plentiful, and days are much easier, when you go through your life expecting miracles!
Aim ever so high, and know that if something/someone appears to 'land short' of that expectation, that your grass is just as green, you can be just as happy, and life is JUST AS MAGICAL is it was before that result appeared.
The world is a place of endless possibilities. Keep allowing those possibilities to show up in your life, and keep on paddling. Life is but a dream...
A spectacular day to you,
Always,
Jill

https://www.facebook.com/ThePerfectCupofCoffeeBook?ref=hl
https://twitter.com/JillsPerfectCup
www.JillaineThompson.com
720-938-5455

Please be sure to sign in to 'follow' this blog!! THANKS! :-D

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Mind Your Mind, And Speak Your Life

We've all heard it a hundred times..."What you think about, you bring about"...or something very similar. We've heard it so many times, perhaps, that we stopped believing it to be true. Maybe it sounds so cliché, that we just don't even register when we hear it anymore.
Well, folks, I'm here to remind you. It is absolutely true. I have countless examples in my own life, not to mention the hundreds, possibly thousands of times I've seen it happen in the lives of my friends, family members, coaching clients and readers.
I'm not writing this blog to beat you over the head, once again, with 'be careful what you think about, because you will draw it into your life'. The reason for this gentle reminder, is an attempt to encourage you to invite much more joy, more peace, more love and support, and more fulfillment into your life. I recently read, then re-Tweeted, Facebooked, and Facebooked again, a great quote from America Ferrera, star of the TV show Ugly Betty.

"I think it's about surrounding yourself with people who remind you who you want to be in your life," - America Ferrera

So very true this statement is. In fact, the very DAY I read, then posted this comment, my family and I had ''game night" at our friend's house, where we met and made another incredible friend! No sooner had I absorbed then shared the quote, than yet another person, who reminded me who I want to be in my life, was brought directly into it!  That's how this works. Get passionate about the things that you're passionate about, and watch them show up in your life!
Jobs, people, relationships, objects, interactions, goals and plans...all of it! Think it, own it, let it really soak into your awareness, and POOF, it'll you'll see it!
One of my favorite books, Spiritual Liberation, by Michael Bernard Beckwith, talks about this very topic in depth, and you can't help but look back into your own past, and see time after time, where you've actually 'thought' something into being.
"You'll always know what your conscious mind is thinking about, because it shows up as your life!!" - Rev. Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith
We've also ALL heard the saying, "Don't even SAY that!" Somewhere, deep in our psyche, we all know that there is truth to the idea of 'thinking' something into being.
This blog, again, is an invitation to YOU, to spend some time, consciously drawing toward you, what it is that you want to experience in your life. Worry brings about worry. Wonderful, uplifting, joyful thoughts bring about wonderful uplifting joy. You get to pick which you get more of :-)
Once you're done 'thinking' about it, surround yourself with people who remind you of who you want to be in your life, and you may be surprised how quickly your life becomes exactly as you've dreamt it to be!
Feel free to drop me a line, and let me know what you're creating!

Wishing you a most glorious and beautiful day today...and always,
Jill

https://www.facebook.com/ThePerfectCupofCoffeeBook?ref=hl
https://twitter.com/JillsPerfectCup
www.JillaineThompson.com
720-938-5455

Please be sure to sign in to 'follow' this blog!! THANKS! :-D

Thursday, March 6, 2014

The Truth and Tragedy of Facebook

Ah, Facebook. "Social networking".  The great connector of people. Rekindling friendships, unifying social groups, keeping families and friends updated on your activities...and perhaps even your meals.
Doing something fun? Post it. Having a rough day? Post it. We use Facebook to incite, inspire and infuriate each other. When something exciting happens to us, we 'Facebook' it. When we feel the need for attention, we 'Facebook'. When we want other people to jump on our bandwagon, we 'Facebook' it. (Note: when I use the word "Facebook", please feel free to substitute the words "Instagram", "Twitter", "SnapChat", and yes, perhaps even 'Blog'.)
We have come to use Facebook, as our own way of standing on the rooftop and screaming at each other. That's a truth. It is also...a tragedy.
It would benefit us all, to keep 2 small yet powerful statements in mind, when using any form of social media. 1)"Anything you say, CAN AND WILL be held against you..." (for eternity) and 2) (perhaps more powerful) "You have the right to remain silent".
Here's what I love about Facebook. I have a friend who is currently living in Thailand, and I am able to see what he's up to on a regular basis. I am very blessed to have friends and family members all over the country, and even some who live overseas, with whom I am able to stay in contact. I have a book that I'm writing, for which I can post updates, gather readers and share ideas.
If it were only used for kind, inspiring purposes, I think we, as a collective whole, would be far better in touch with ourselves and each other.
However, all too often, this medium is used as a vehicle for spreading gossip, sharing judgments, touting righteousness, and basically keeping ourselves and each other stuck in a bottomless pit of drama and 'he said, she said'. "Friends" aren't always actual 'friends', but people we want to keep track of, for one reason or another. Sometimes, we keep them around, just because we don't want to deal with the backlash of 'unfriending' them! As though 'unfriending' someone means that either you or they will instantly cease to exist on this planet! Remember the days when you'd actually go months, even YEARS without connecting with someone! Then, one day in a grocery store, BOOM!!!, there they are! Still on the planet. People stay in touch with 'ex's' because they don't want to think that they're gone forever. Toxic.  So often, people have come to judge their 'like-ability' or self worth, based on how many 'likes' they get on their page!  Absurd.  We'll even go so far as to keep tabs on how many 'friends' our friends have, to make sure we stay ahead. Sad.
I understand that Facebook, and social media as a whole has many, MANY positive aspects, and can absolutely be used for good. But, as with so many things that go on in a glutinous society, we've gone completely overboard with our use of, and involvement in social media. It has become our favorite pastime, our soap box for 'getting our point across', and the scale by which we gauge our likability.
That is nothing short of tragic.
So, here is my invitation to you. Next time you have a coffee break, time between classes, or 30 minutes while you wait for your clothes to dry, I encourage you to:
  • put on your sunglasses, and go walk around the block
  • go talk to someone, face to face, in the next cubicle, in the hallway or at the water cooler
  • call a friend, pet your dog, read a magazine or just spend some time in your thoughts.
There is a beautiful and amazing world going by, OUTSIDE of technology. Take a little time today to get reconnected with THAT world, and allow yourself to be in it.

Wishing you a most glorious and beautiful day today...and always,
Jill

https://www.facebook.com/ThePerfectCupofCoffeeBook?ref=hl
https://twitter.com/JillsPerfectCup
www.TheNaturalBodyWorks.com
720-938-5455

Please be sure to sign in to 'follow' this blog!! THANKS! :-D

Friday, January 31, 2014

Adios Jan!!

Thanks for the memories!!
On this the last day of January, 2014, I have decided (and encourage you to) take a moment to reflect in gratitude for the blessings of this past month. For myself, there were family members' birthdays and a special anniversary for a very dear friend. My brother and sister came in from Michigan, and my Earth Angel and her mom came in from Utah. I was blessed to have countless enriching and inspiring conversations with friends, patients, clients and family members. I was asked to be a Bridesmaid in my beautiful and amazing cousin's wedding. I had a fantastic meeting with my book editor, and remained strong and healthy throughout the entire month, while the flu ran amuck all around me.
This past 30 1/2 days have been filled with lots of Laughter, Love and Light. Thank you, January 2014 for all the beautiful blessings you brought into my life, and I bid you a fond and gratitude ridden farewell.
Now...on to February!!

What are some of the events, activities and memories you experienced this month? Write, remember and be grateful for them all!

Until Next Time,
Jill


https://www.facebook.com/ThePerfectCupofCoffeeBook?ref=hl
https://twitter.com/JillsPerfectCup
www.TheNaturalBodyWorks.com
720-938-5455

Please be sure to sign in to 'follow' this blog!! THANKS! :-D

Thursday, January 30, 2014

That Split Second....

That Split Second, When The Whole World Looks Different...

As anyone in my personal life knows, I've see the movie "The Secret Life of Walter Mitty" five (yes, 5) times so far. Those who know me best totally get why I can't get enough of this movie, while others ask, "Why so many times?"
Although the movie, in its entirety, is an incredibly uplifting, heart-felt and inspiring experience, the 'snapshot' above...the very moment captured in this still photo is my primary 'draw' to this story.
In a very quick nutshell, the movie is a fantastic journey that one man takes, as he transforms is internal and hidden 'sense of adventure', and brings it all to life, as his daily experience. The moment captured in this single frame (above) is a pivotal moment in that transformation, from my perspective.
Just prior to this frame, he took a literal leap of faith...a leap doused in fear, and jumped onto an already launching helicopter. In this frame, and for the next several seconds of the film, you can clearly see the look of "HOLY CRAP!!! I DID IT!!!! I ACTUALLY JUST DID THAT!!!!!!", and his life, his perspective, his words and actions are never the same!
It is this very moment that has me captivated. The moment of shift. The moment of exhilaration, when everything that you thought was extreme, unlikely or 'outside of your reach' is all the sudden firmly in your grasp.
When you take that leap into the space that is just past what you think you can do...the world suddenly opens up, and things you never imagined could happen for you - are within arms reach.
It is only when we are willing to take that leap into the unknown or uncertain, that we are able to truly see the vast expanse of possibilities that are available to us.
If you have a goal, an intention, an idea or a dream that you are not acting on, nor moving toward, you truly have no idea how magical your life can be. Its like living your whole life, believing that ice cream comes in just one flavor. You cannot even IMAGINE what you're missing!
So, this is the draw that The Secret Life of Walter Mitty has for me, and this is what I invite you to explore in your own life!
Take that step. Make that leap. Chase that dream. Because in the process, things, people, places and opportunities BEYOND YOUR IMAGINATION will open up for you!!
As the movie says, "Life is about courage, and going into the unknown"...so GO!!
GO!! There's no more to read here...GO MAKE YOUR LIFE HAPPEN!!! <3

Until Next Time,
Jill

https://www.facebook.com/ThePerfectCupofCoffeeBook?ref=hl
https://twitter.com/JillsPerfectCup
www.TheNaturalBodyWorks.com
720-938-5455

Please be sure to sign in to 'follow' this blog!! THANKS! :-D

Friday, November 29, 2013

Gifts or Burdens??

Is it a gift or is it a burden? How do you know the difference? What do you do with it, once you've determined its appropriate category? Does it really matter how you look at it? What are the qualities that make one thing a "gift" and one thing a "burden"?
So many questions to ponder! I assure you, these questions may come off as a burden to begin with, but they're truly a gift. :-D Lets jump right in, shall we?
According to Merriam-Webster, a gift is
: something that is given to another person or to a group or organization
: a special ability
According to Merriam-Webster, a burden is
:  something that is carried :  load
:  duty, responsibility
:  something oppressive or worrisome
 
According to Jill Thompson, the only difference in these 2 ideas is how you choose to receive whatever it is that you are given.
 Lets use this first, in the context of the upcoming holidays. A gift card. Someone gives you a gift card as a holiday gift. What is your first thought?
1) "WOW, COOL! Now I get to go to the _____ store and buy myself the _____ that I wanted!"
OR
2) "okay, now I have to add a trip to _____ to my ever growing list of things to do, so I can try to pick something out that I can use."
Gift or burden?
In this example, as with everything else, its all in how you look at it.
Someone at work shares their heart with you. Gift or burden?
A neighbor gives you a holiday present. Gift or burden?
Your kid needs a ride to his/her friend's house. Gift or burden?
A friend of yours says, "I need someone to talk to, do you have a minute?". Gift or burden?
These are common examples, just to set the stage, because I'm about to "go big" with this idea, so brace yourself. I want to make sure that you get the entire concept of 'gift or burden', because it covers just about everything that we encounter during any (and every) given day, and I think a clear understanding of the GIFT of choice can truly help make a difference in your day...every day.
Now, lets go BIG!
Your skills. Your dreams. Your interests. Your special qualities.
Does it stress you out, trying to pursue your passion, or does it come easy for you?
Does it bring about worry to pursue your interests, or do you find joy in that process?
Are you 'fighting' to live your 'purpose'?
I'm a sign language interpreter. That is a passion of mine. I learned the alphabet from a lady named Holly Hugdahl when I was in 2nd Grade. I spelled EVERYTHING until I met Stacy, my first deaf friend in college. I spelled everything to her, and in a very short amount of time, she said, "This conversation could take forever, so let's teach you signs, okay?" OKAY!!!!
I learned from her (gift), then was able to test out of ASL 1, and ASL 2 when I transferred to California State University, Northridge (gift). I took several more classes at CSUN, and graduated with an Associates Degree in Deaf Studies. Since then, I've been blessed to have several jobs as an interpreter, as well as many "in the right place at the right time" occurrences where sign language was needed. For me, sign language is a huge Gift. It took some work on my behalf to get skilled enough to be fluent, but never once has it created stress, worry, panic, or up-set in my life. Its never been a struggle, and I've never felt 'guh, why do I have this burden to carry?' One of the (many) greatest memories in my whole life, was standing at the stage, at the Red Rocks Amphitheater, interpreting for recording artist, Jewel, and having her watch me 'present' her songs in a way that went far beyond the auditory senses.
My reason for using this example is because I do know several people who see 'knowing sign language' as a burden. They 'had' to learn it because they have a deaf parent or sibling. I know a couple of parents of deaf children who refused to learn sign language, because they wanted their kid(s) to learn how to function in the 'hearing world'. One mother actually told me "it would have been too hard to learn a whole other language as an adult." For me (and MANY others!) learning sign language opened so many doors in my life, that may not have been opened otherwise. Some of my dearest friends are deaf...and if I hadn't learned to sign, that may not be the case. But there are plenty of other people who see sign language as a burden, or something that they 'have' to do, because of other circumstances in their lives.
The minute you receive something, a present, a phone call or text, an idea, a dream, an insight, epiphany, or realization of your inner-self, you get the opportunity to see and accept it as a gift or as a burden. That choice is completely YOURS. How you choose to receive it will determine your path for handling it.
Going back to the Merriam-Webster definitions, I offer this.
A "gift" is
: something that is given to another person or to a group or organization
: a special ability
:  something that is carried :  load
:  duty, responsibility
that makes you happy, and brings joy to your life, and consequently to the lives of others
 
A "burden" is
: something that is given to another person or to a group or organization
: a special ability
:  something that is carried :  load
:  duty, responsibility
that causes you stress and disharmony, should NOT be passed on to anyone else, and should be discarded and/or eliminated as SOON AS POSSILBE!
Take a burden and drop it like a hot potato, or change something about IT or YOUR THINKING, and make it a gift.
Whether we're talking about a personality trait or characteristic, a job, a task (or a whole list of them!), a person, a dream, an idea or an opportunity, the choice is YOURS to receive it as a gift or a burden.
Choose wisely because therein lies your journey.

Have you got something that you see as a burden, and cannot see how you could possibly turn it into a gift? Comment below, or shoot me an e-mail, I will be more than happy to help you reframe it, and make it work in your favor!

Wishing you an amazing selecting process, and days filled with joy, love, happiness and GIFTS!
Jill

DrSeanAndJill@TheNaturalBodyWorks.com
 
 


 
 
 

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Which Voice Are YOU Listening To?

Listen to your heart? Listen to your head? Listen to your gut? Listen to those other voices that exist in that 'somewhere else' - out there? Listen to the voices from your childhood? Previous relationships? Ex-employers? Bullies from long ago? (or bullies from NOT SO long ago?)
Our days are filled with a constant barrage of voices. Some positive, some less so. Some, downright hurtful! The sad truth is, that most of the negativity that flies around in our minds is self-induced!
Although we may have actually heard those voices, speaking hurtful words, they probably do not exist in this very moment. But, we can hear them as though they're the loudest thing in the room. We carry voices with us all day. Some ours, some not. But regardless of whom they belong to, we have conversations going on in our heads ALL DAY and most of the night! Go ahead, try to have NO conversation in your head. Try it. I'll wait.

Over the past several months, my life has taken some pretty measurable turns. My attitude has changed, my happiness has dramatically increased, I've lost weight, I sleep better, my business has gotten much busier, and more successful, my friendships are stronger, and I have more of them. My outlook on life has widened, and I almost feel taller!
So I asked myself, what changed? What happened that created all of these wonderful and positive changes. My answer came quickly and clearly. I changed the voices that I was listening to. That's it. That one change in my thought process, resulted in every aspect of my life getting noticeably better.  Clearer. Stronger. Brighter. Healthier.

You know the image. The devil on one shoulder, and an angel on the other. Each one whispering their sound advice into their respective ear. It would be much easier if there were only 2 sources from which we get these voices! Trouble comes when there are SEVERAL voices, and we hear them ALL, and try to sort through them to determine which ONE we're going to listen to! "Yes", "No", "Maybe", "What if...", "How will I.."and the list goes on.  If only it were as easy as eenie meenie miney mo!
Do any of these sound familiar?
The Fear Voice. What if this doesn't work? What if I'm wrong? How many times do we have to 'start again' before you realize you're not going to accomplish this? You can't stick to anything. That kind of happiness, just isn't for you. You're better off not even trying, because you're not going to make it, anyway. You're not smart enough. You're not talented enough. You're just going to look stupid, so don't even bother.
The Doomed Voice. This is as good as its ever going to get. There just aren't that many jobs available, so be grateful for the one you have. Good enough is good enough. You're too old to get started on that now - learn to be happy with what you have. Its too late.
The "Yes You Can" Voice. You've got this! You're better off now, anyway! This is all you!

You recognize these? Well, I'm here to tell you that NONE of these statements is true.. Not one single one of them. We go into much more detail in the book, (The Perfect Cup of Coffee), but in short, here's the TRUTH. Not one of these statements is more true than any other.
"Whether You Believe You Can, Or You Can't, You Are Right" - Henry Ford
So you get to pick. You get to decide which voices you're going to listen to, and if you're in a place in your life where you're 'stuck' - you're listening to the wrong ones! Make another choice.
We tend to allow these voices (good or bad) to ring in our heads like the drips of water torcher, so you want to make sure you choose wisely! The "plink...plink...plink" of Walt Disney's quote, "If you can dream it, you can achieve it" is a WAY better way to spend your life than the plinks of "What if I'm wrong", agreed?
So, take inventory. Which voices are you listening to? Often the ones in our heads have the most 'outside influence', and tend to be 'thoughts of old'. Habitual thinking. The 'mind thoughts' tend to be the most stale. That's why you tend to get a physiological reaction when a 'new thought' comes in and resonates with you. Even your BRAIN gets excited to receive new ideas! (Again, more about that in the upcoming book, The Perfect Cup of Coffee). Our heart-voice tends to be pretty reliable, although it communicates regularly with the head, so there's some 'outside influence' in there, as well. Gut - that's a pretty safe bet. The gut keeps its distance from both the head and the heart, so it tends to protect itself from the outside influence. It also tends to answer most quickly, and over-analyze the least! "Gut-instinct", if you will.
Take your inventory, and be sure to evict the voices that tend to harm you the most. You don't need them. They certainly don't move you forward in your life.
I invite you to comment below - what voices are holding you back? What are you hearing, then repeating to yourself, that may be keeping you stuck? What voices do you hear that propel you forward? What can YOU do to only hear the ones that inspire you?
I look forward to your comments!
A beautiful, selectively thoughtful day to you!
Jill

https://www.facebook.com/ThePerfectCupofCoffeeBook?ref=hl
https://twitter.com/JillsPerfectCup
www.TheNaturalBodyWorks.com